I hadn’t posted anything for two weeks because I wasn’t feeling up to the mark (i.e. in my state of my mind) and still wouldn’t have posted anything if not for this (by Allah’s mercy):
ووددت أني خليت بين المطي وحاديها.. وتركت القوس وباريها.. وما تجهمت ما لست له بأهل.. وما ليس لي فيه ناقة ولا جمل.. ولكني رأيت سوق الباطل رائجة، وساحة الحق راكدة، فألقيت حسب استطاعتي بذرة طيبة.. في أرض زاكية.. لعلها تؤتي أكلها كل حين.. حتى يبعث الله من يزرع البساتين.. ويفجر الأنهار في العالمين.
[Roughly translated:] “And I wanted to be free of the rides (vehicles) and their drivers, and leave the bows and their archers, and I wouldn’t have walked (on this journey of writing this book) as I was not capable of it, and I didn’t have in this journey male or female camels (i.e. resources). But I saw the market of falsehood flourishing, and the yard of haqq (truth) stagnant, so I planted a pure seed, according to my capacity, in the pure land, so that it gives fruit all the time, till Allah raises those who implant it into gardens, and rivers would spring forth for the worlds.”
The Shaykh tells here that why did he write this book. He says that though he wanted to leave the people as they were, throwing bows or whatever they were doing and he also considered himself incapable of undertaking the journey of writing this book plus he was short of resources for this journey but he still did it. Why? Because he saw that the market of bad was strong (market involves lots of people, right?), meaning people were indulged in bad stuff and compared to that the field of truth was stagnant without any activity in it. In contrast to a market, the stagnated yard presents to the mind a desolate picture. So the author took it on himself to do something against the bad and for the good and so he wrote this book, in the deserted landscape of good, that he compares to just a seed that he sowed in the bare land. He couldn’t bear the widespread falsehood, and the good in such a pathetic condition so he did something about it in spite of all the weaknesses mentioned above. Because he hoped that his seed would give fruit and one day Allah will bring people who will take that seed growth further and make it into gardens and from them rivers of purity and good and knowledge would flow to the worlds.
So yeah, this was such a reminder for me. Just when I needed it most. Here I was thinking that I shouldn’t write being in this low state of mind, thinking what good would it do anyway. But I was wrong. And alhamdulillah Allah showed it to me. Look at the Shaykh’s book now. It ‘s such a blessing. If he had given way to such thoughts as mine, we wouldn’t even have this book today. What a deprivation would that have been.
How can I take my petty matters in to account and ignore the markets of darkness around? Shouldn’t I work towards ‘un’-stagnating the land of good? Don’t millions need it today?
And then Allah requires consistency in actions, not perfection. The author calls his book only a tiny seed, not a perfect thing. So if I’m posting something good weekly, however small it may be I should just keep doing it instead of leaving it thinking, ‘it’s not going to be perfect’ or ‘I just can’t do it’ etc. So do a little good deed but do it consistently. And if you do something even when feeling low, just to maintain the consistency, then Allah will bring khair out of it inshaAllah.
Do not underestimate and keep on doing it.
Moreover the author is so hopeful that the seed will turn into gardens and rivers supplying to the worlds. We should hope for the best too.
I’ve learnt my lesson, hope you have too. :)